Mikindani - Soap Opera?
Tuesday, September 30th, 2008The first spectacular event featured Matt the archaeoligists departure.
One day Matt had hired a taxi driver named Becca (yes just like our 2 year old neighbor who’s favourite past-time is hitting anyone with anything in reach) to take him to the airport. Becca decided that he would arrive one hour early, just to be extra cautious since we all know that African time differs a great deal of what Europeans call ‘on time.’ He then proceeded to listen to his car radio until finally his battery gave out, surprise surprise. Matt then decided to give Becca his bike to go ‘fetch somebody to fix his car’, whatever this may mean. In the meantime, time is ticking. Matt is anxious about his flight leaving without him and asks Kate (fellow NGO trekker) to give him a lift to the airport. All is well and good, the kids laugh and jump on Beccas car and Matt gets to the airport in time, whew! However, trouble is stewing in Mikindani. One, two, even three hours pass and finally Becca returns to take his already departed passenger to the airport. To Becca’s surprise Matt is no where to be found. Becca demands action! He demands ‘bossi kubwa’ aka big boss aka ME of EdUKaid! Accompanied by innocent or not so innocent Zaidu, (the one with the triangular head not his twin brother to clarify) the two storm into EdUKaid….
Meanwhile, diligent and hard-working bossi kubwa (hehehe) is having a meeting with one of the head teachers of the schools. The two flail into the office (uninvited may I add) and start yelling, surprisingly not at me but at the teacher that has become victim to their plot. “ Where is Matt, where is my money…etc.” The poor teacher looks confused. I say to them “Twende” meaning “Lets go”! This phrase has no negative connation but is a direct command. No one seems to listen. Hmmmm, what to do??? I give the example myself and after some more harassment of the teacher they all come upstairs, I look to Halima for some sympathy. We are all now very much irritated although the teacher looks like he is going to break out in tears. Becca then tells us, that he took the bike to the police as ransom, haaa haa! He says its an EdUKaid bike. DAMN. After explaining repeatedly that the situation is not my problem I start to think again. What to do, what to do. I figure it is easier to pay him off, get the bike, and get the money from Matt when/if he returns. Makes life much easier if you know anything about Tanzanian police. I then remark with “Toka Bwana” which translates to a slighty more aggressive tone than before, meaning “Piss off Mister” which is the closest I could to swearing in Swahili. I then shoved the money in his face and stomped off. Done Deal.
Event #2. Oh yes there is something else. Entitled: Judge Judy(ies) to the rescue
A couple of days (or one) after the first dramatic event, another came our way. We had some visitors, specifically P.Diddy (yes that’s his name, don’t ask), Saida, and unidentified gender person (name will be mentioned later). They come, they sit, they talk, and oops one of them runs into the Mess Room. The Mottisfont crew disoriented, did not realize another visitor was left on the veranda. Luckily, this story has a superhero by the name of ARBY!!!!
Arby was also on the veranda, concentrating on his homework, as he does most days. This unidentified gender person, tells Arby that she/he, and I quote “if god willing, will steal the radio tomorrow” , not the smartest of moves but hey who’s judging. Thereafter, Arby saves the day by telling the askaris which then tell Ally which then tell me, yes a long process I know, and they tell me it was saida. Ok I say , no more of this! I am kicking her out!
Later that afternoon, Saida comes to tell me that it was unidentified gender person named Hadija, not her. I say ohhh no no no, you can’t trick me missy, I know it was you, it was you who ran into the Mess Room, a suspicious act around these parts. I yelled some more and kicked her out.
A couple minutes later, P.Diddy comes to clarify the matter. He says, no it really was Hadija, really. I say I don’t believe you get Arby in here. The court procession starts. Superhero Arby reports to duty. I speak to him in isolation. Then to my surprise the two stories match! But how can this be?? I call in the askari, he confirms. So why was it said that it was Saida earlier? Nobody knows and looks at me like I’m the crazy one. I then have to go apologize to Saida who is rolling around the dirt outside of Mottisfont. She seems angry. I apologize but forbid her to come again, besides who knows maybe they worked as a team? That part settled, P.Diddy refuses to come upstairs and mops around downstairs near the door, his “girlfriend or sister” (the relationship is unclear) on the other side. Oh the pain.
Some more bad news. Arby tells us Hadija beat him up and that he’s scared to go home. OH NO, Alex says, nobody beats up my Arby! Quickly to Ismaelis! (Kate and Alex, batman and robin, go to find Hadija.)
Hadija is sat down near Ismaeli and is reprimanded. When asked, why did you try to steal? She says no it was Arby. Why did you beat up Arby then (in broad day light)? No answer. Guilty as charged!
So there we have it, Mikindani, just like a Brazilian soap opera but without the love story…..well who knows what next weeks adventures will bring! (although I wouldn’t hold my breath, next month is Ramadan, actually a whole month of hungry, irritated Tanzanians sounds promising…)
Marta Krajnik
